I would love to see the thought process that our brain goes through when we’ve been alone for a while. Some productive people fill their hours with working out, working hard, working on themselves. I’m not one of these people.
Others bounce from one relationship to the next, racking up more rebounds than Dennis Rodman. I am definitely not one of these girls. I have a hard time getting one guy to pay attention, so I certainly don’t have them lined up waiting for me. Granted, maybe I could if all I was looking for was a warm body to fill the space in my bed and my heart.
My emotional default setting swings right back to the last relationship that made me happy. It may not have even made me happy in the end, but whenever I find myself lacking a crush I turn to romanticizing every man I have never met. I find myself scrolling through my phone and wondering what happened to guys who I thought fell off the face of the earth, and considering sending emails to guys I haven’t spoken to in months.
Word to the wise- this tactic does absolutely nothing for the old self-esteem. Imagining what you once had, unbalanced with all of the reasons why it no longer exists, is about as satisfying as watching the Food Network when you’re famished. Lately, it’s got me questioning what continues to leave me in the three-date-and-drop trap, and those are just when I’m lucky.
And, sure, I know all the advice that can get me out of this slump. Get out there and put our game face on, because you won’t meet someone at home. Don’t go looking for a relationship because you’ll always find one when you least expect it. Keep yourself busy with other interests to make yourself more desirable.
But right now I’m stuck in the past. I’m taking a walk through my Not So Wonderful Relationship Life and reveling in those rare moments where I felt attractive, adored, respected, and desired. For the moment, it feels like they’re all I’ve got.
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2 Comments
Don’t do it girl! I think you described me. I am definitely one of those people who liked to dwell in the past and wonder what could have been so bad. That’s how I ended up back with my ex, for the second time and it still didn’t work. You need to take away those options, as hard as it is, it would be beneficial for you to delete the numbers, throw away the cards, notes, and pictures. I don’t agree with the sentiment that “it will happen someday” and “when you least expect it” either. However, I do agree that you need to keep busy, even if its not to find a guy. You will think about your past failed relationships a lot less, take it from me!
Posted Friday, January 18, 2008 at 9:27 am | Permalink
Ouch.
The past is the past…keep it there….delete those numbers and emails…. you will have a new crush soon enough.
I am glad that your ‘little dry spell’ has inspired more POSTS from you.
Posted Friday, January 18, 2008 at 12:32 pm | Permalink
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