ExposedNYC

I’ve never been a girlfriend kind of girl. I’ve heard that our generation is notorious for not dating, but I see us dividing instead into distinct groups- the ones guys want as girlfriends, and those who are okay with not being girlfriends. I’ve generally fallen into the second category.

I don’t think I’ve ever met a guy who is looking for a relationship. Even if I did, I probably wouldn’t be attracted to him because it would be a blow to his alpha male side that I need to have at least a glimpse of. What I have met is a lot of guys who are looking for a purely physical relationship.

I’ve recently fallen into one of these with Boston Boy, a cute, cocky young sports fanatic who I started working with who was only going to be in town briefly when we met but ended up staying for more of a long-term assignment. We both stumbled into our first drunken make-out session thinking that we had an expiration date but when it was renewed for another season we weren’t quite sure how to act around each other. We had both been adamant about it being exactly what we were looking for in the moment because it had made it easier to justify.

It’s gone on for a few weeks, with a constant dance of insisting that we’re not a couple when in public. And even though my ego gets slightly hurt every time I hear it, I tend to vocalize just as strongly to assure him that I’m okay with our arrangement. It’s become a running joke, as most co-workers and mutual friends make silly comments and we smile slyly and deny having any idea what they’re referring to.

There are times, though, that I wish I could say what I want as easily as I could come up with what I think the other person wants to hear. The only problem is, without the security of actually being a girlfriend, what’s to stop them from walking away?

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